Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Victims Of Love


Well The Bachelor done did it now. Look at all you people clamoring for a blog, and you know who you are posting on fb and sending me emails. Yes you do. Which leads me to believe that the show has FINALLY achieved what it promises every show, every year. We have finally witnessed the MOST DRAMATIC ROSE CEREMONY EVER.

For those of you who somehow found better things to do with your time than witness what Chris (the host) himself called "a historic journey", here's the quick 411. Jason and his chosen woman (Melissa) hit a rough patch during the 6 weeks between wrap and this show. Jason suddenly realizes that all along he REALLY wanted Molly, the woman he cast aside for Melissa. So...in an unprecedented, and apparently historical step for this show, Jason comes on without a studio audience and DUMPS Melissa on live TV. Because he has feelings for Molly. Melissa handles it gracefully, although she did get in one jab that I think we all agreed with, "You're a b$#@tard." Yes, yes he is. HUGE kudos to Melissa for the most graceful exit in Bachelor history. I assure you I would have been inflicting alternating physical and emotional abuse on his sorry, sorry self while shouting, "Show me the tears now you drama queen!!"

Molly joins him next and Jason informs her that he made a mistake (uh-huh, a mistake) and he wishes he had kept her instead of Melissa. Will she take him back? Molly looks properly stunned and thinks it may be the cruelest joke ever played, until she realizes by looking at Jason's pathetic face that it really is in fact serious. Lots of uncomfortable laughter. Uncomfortable silence. And then...she. takes. him. back. Oh, Molly.

OK. I don't blame her. I understand her choice on two levels. One, vindication on national television. I'm not a reject! Two, It's sort of the dream every girl has when she's dumped right? Pathetic, but true. One day he'll realize he made a mistake and I was the best thing he ever had and he'll come back to tell me so. Yeah. Molly got what every girl wants. Making me question why we all want that. Pathetic? Yeah.

Molly should proceed with caution. He left? There's probably a reason. In Molly's case, how many of us will be surprised when Jason shows up bawling on the TV in another month and is quite certain it was Jillian he should have never left? Not I. But Jillian, Run. Run like the wind.

Is there anyone else who thinks he may be the most fragile and emotionally confused guy EVER? I mean, I think the amount and drama of his tears in 3 months of filming put Tammy Baker to shame.

And now I'm going to say something that may be crossing the line, but it must be said. How 'bout that kid? Did anyone else think little Ty might be a little...odd? But let's be fair - dad is probably confusing the heck out of him, and even Ty was shocked when they were reunited in New Zealand and he saw his dad running towards him sobbing like he had been shipwrecked on an island for 3 years and they were just being reunited. This isn't Lost, and until you live what poor little Walt lived through, try a less dramatic approach. I bet every week Ty's thinking, "Can't wait to see dad - this week it will be the most dramatic reunion EVER!" While Jason was Mauling Ty, you could hear his little voice asking, "Why you crying dad?" That's a question we'd all like answered. My brother Shawn has been in London for two weeks-- I can't imagine the kind of dramatic reunion I'll witness with his kids after that. Believe me, I'll be bringing the popcorn and snagging a front row seat.

I could go on for hours, but I won't. I'd like to hear what you have to say. I will end with this though. Deanna. What a letdown. It was so obvious that she really didn't care if she got him back and was just looking for one last shot at seeing her face on color TV. Besides the fact that her horrible outfit left me pining even more for a dash of Jillian's good taste, I expected more drama from her.

And that's where I thought the show was headed when Jason dumped Melissa. In my ideal world, after he dumped Melissa, he would have asked Molly to take him back and she would have brought it full circle by doing to him what he did to Deanna. Saying I'll pass. Then what you ask? The two lamest people to ever grace the bachelor---the two most drama-rama, attention loving fools could have cried their lives away together forever--Deanna and Jason finally end up together.

Victims of love, in love. Now that's Reality.

10 comments:

Amy Brindley said...

Didn't you see Jimmy Kimmel? It was all staged the break-up had already occured! Thus the poor acting, but I thought it was pretty genuine of Molly. I bought that she was shocked. And I totally agree with you on the Deanna thing. La-Zame! But I loved Molly from the beg. I thought she was the most real and genuine. And really, you can't make a decision about who to choose when you love both. You have to date one, see how that goes, and then make a decision. None of this dating two... Still like Jason, still like Molly and feel really bad for Melissa. IS that enough feedback for ya?

jweed said...

yeah, i thought it was all awful. jason said some pretty lame things, but the worst of all was, "you can't fight what you feel in your heart. If you feel that, you just have to go for it." i hate to see what happens when Ty has a super cute teacher one day, and Jason suddenly has feelings for her. he'll just have to follow those. no regrets, you know? the whole "live" television break-up was sickening. poor melissa.

anyway, as for your North Carolina stint, what days will you exactly be down here? matt & i will be in Mexico from the 14th-19th. please be down here after that so we can have a very dramatic reunion!!throw me an email about your plans.

Kari Badell said...

My husband said that Jason just doesn't know what he wants and it's true. I can't imagine being in Molly's position and ever taking him back after watching him full on make out with Jillian in the hot tub and then send her packing the next day. I think that she's much better than Jason and deserves better, but I think she's an idiot for taking him back. I mean falling in love with 3 different women in a matter of 6 months is ridiculous! And I like what you said about Ty. I definitely think there are some emotional issues there with Jason and it's rubbing off on his son.

I have a prediction - that Molly will dump Jason because she can't stand his crying anymore.

DTR said...

You know, I don't even watch this show, but I saw a headline about the final episode on some news site, and rather than clicking on the link I came straight to Spin-ster Stories to get what I knew would be an incisive analysis. I was not disappointed. It sounds like this Melissa person should have borrowed a line from your friend Wallace. Maybe violating FCC rules goes against the contract signed by contestants.

KA said...

1 - I'm ashamed of myself for a) watching this show and b) caring enough to have an opinion about it.

2 - Sometimes (b/c of someone who seems quasi normal, like Jillian) I forget that you have to be certifiably insane to go on any reality show, much less The Bachelor.

3 - The contract to televise every part of the relationship is crazy but hello? We all watched it. PS: I wonder when the cut-off date was? Like, if they would have waited until Easter to break up, do they get to do it privately and then just leak it to ew.com or how exactly does the contract work?

4 - Jillian dodged a monumental bullet.

5 - Bless Melissa's heart, but she clearly needs counseling for her co-dependent issues.

6 - Molly is not as smart as I would have thought she was, if she thinks that she won't be the next victim of Jason's inability to have a normal relationship.

7 - I sort of feel bad for all of them, for being the kinds of people that voluntarily put themselves in these sorts of positions in the first place.

7a - At least Jillian admitted that the only reason she went on the show to begin with was for an adventure. Refer to point #4.

Shauri said...

This is all awesome and hilarious feedback, but I have to say DTR hit on the most awesomely relevant past blog reference- "Adios MFer." Thanks for the laugh and thanks to Wallace for providing the material!

jamie said...

my favorite moment of the whole night was when Melissa gave Jason the ring back and he tried to touch her hand as he took the ring back and she would have any of that! what an awesome move on her part. I have to say Melissa was awesome last night. Very proud of her. Molly, on the other hand, just as insane as Jason. I loved how she was all hestitant, "yes i'd love to do coffee, we have a lot to talk about..." and then she's making out with him on the couch!! hello?!?! Desperate much? I completely, 100% agree that Jason and DeAnna are a match made in heaven. Like I said, hero to zero in 30 seconds flat.

jamie said...

oh and PS please record your dramatic reunion with Julie! Definitely want to see that one. ;) Which of you will be the crier?

Garrett said...

Didn't read all of the post, or any of the feedback, but I will say this. I feel dumber. You all need to take a step back and reflect. All I can say is I'm glad it's over so I won't see this crap on your blog anymore. Until next season anyway...

JJ said...

Okay, ignore last comment, am now completely uptodate and agree with everything you said!

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